prayer.

LOVE THIS.

Both of these things are perfect reminders for me today.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyxZdpL-xeU&feature=related

the heart of the matter.

So I was listening to the end of my podcast this morning and Matt was talking about where we find our value, worth, confidence, etc. He talked about this list of questions below and was just talking about answering them honestly and if you do, you will see where you find your heart, what you spend your time on, what you dwell on, what you need to give up to Him, what you put in place of Him. It's funny/wonderful how God almost always meets me where I'm at; with an embrace, with a lesson, with grace.

1. What are you most afraid of?
2. What do you long for most passionately
3. Where do you run for comfort? Anger?
4. What do you complain about most?
5. What angers you most?
6. What makes you happiest?
7. How do you define yourself to people?
8. What has caused you to be angry with God?
9. What do you brag about?
10. What one thing do you want the most?
11. What do you sacrifice for? (sacrifice = worship)
12. If you change one thing in your life, what would it be?
13. Who’s approval are you seeking? Is it anyone other than Jesus?
14. What do you want to control or master?
15. What comfort do you treasure the most?

wishing and hoping... (to the tune in "my best friends wedding")

Hurry up Friday!



Cant wait for...

spending time with my best friends,
drinking too much wine,
hangin' on the beach,
solving the worlds problems one sangria at a time,
taking pics in our sweet bikini cover ups,
making memories,
fishing on the dock,
sittin' at the spot,
and hanging with the people I love more than anything.

Definitely feeling GRATEFUL.

Now...HURRY UP FRIDAY. PLEASE!

Let's play catch up!

Soooo. It's FRIDAY! I only had a 2 day work week in the office and it was 2 days too long. Grateful for the upcoming weekend and getting to spend time in the dirty d!

I tried to blog quite a few times last week but had zero time and whenever I did I was a tad bit on the tired side... SO, here is my trip/life update!

 (the beach in front of our hotel)

 (catamaran cruise!!! it was kinda overcast but normally the water is beautiful!)

I had quite a few others but they won't upload into here for some reason! The best part about my trip was getting to love on some really precious kids for 3 days. Being surrounded by orphans and kids/women that have been severly affected by domestic violence is very humbling and makes me grateful to get to hear their stories and still see that they have JOY. Joy in the little things like safety, people they love, a roof over there heads...you get the picture. If that doesn't show how good God is, I don't know what will. Their faith and love for people is humbling and God really showed me a lot on this trip through my students AND the ministry that we worked with.

Things I love today:

 

John Mayer's song Sucker...."Sometimes I wish that I was the weather, you’d bring me up in conversation forever. And when it rained, I’d be the talk of the day."

 

 I will be on the beach with my besties in a week and couldn't be happier about it!

 

This sermon - http://northway.thevillagechurch.net/sermons (discipline or wrath? habakkuk part 7) exactly what i needed to hear yesterday when i was driving home from work. Yes I had my headphones in, so what, my car is a 2005 with no aux plug. Ancient. I KNOW. But...so grateful for the Village Church and the teaching and growth it has brought me in the past year!

 

http://www3.dmagazine.com/content/must-do-dallas hoping to complete this list with the roomies and anyone else in tow! except for maybe the fake boobs part, and a few others...

 

(I really have to make this sooooooon!)

 

words of wisdom. I will start with applying this to my boss. ;)

 

 

Here's to a beautiful weekend spent outside enjoying the amazing weather!

 

It's like this.

Sometimes things just hit you...

 

"Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my best friend."— Albert Camus

 

So beyond grateful for each person that the Lord has put into my life for such specific reasons. It's little moments when I see how perfect His design is and how perfect each friend is that I realize how blessed I am. The roles each person plays in my life I really just don't know what I would do without...so, I guess just thanks for always loving me and showing me what love really is through every friendship I have. GRATEFUL is the only word I can think to describe it.

 

With all that being said...today is my beautiful roomie/best friends big 2-4!!

 

 

Right now I wish more than anything I was in the Dirty-D celebrating with her! Lune you so so much kk!

 

(sorry for being so sappy, it was just necessary : ))

 

 

Living in the moment...

Most days are like any other day. Everyone has their specific morning routine. You may wake up, brush your teeth maybe, watch TV, shower, etc, etc.

Most mornings I wake up and the first thing I do is check twitter. Kinda weird, I know but this morning I did and I saw so many people tweeting about Japan. It led me to immediately open up my news app and see what exactly was going on.

Let me say, I have actually be in 3 earthquakes. One in Acapulco, Mexico in 8th grade; and the other 2 in San Diego, CA and Puerto Rico last year. Kinda a lot for one person! So, I have definitely felt the ground shake. It's almost like your mind is playing tricks on you and it takes you a moment to realize that the ground and the walls are actually moving. Thankfully no one I know or myself was ever injured so to think that this people below woke up to this earthquake followed by a tsunami COMPLETELY. BLOWS. MY. MIND.

I kinda start to think why them?, why does it "seem" like natural disasters hit communities and countries that have a harder time rebounding and recovering. I mean the list could go on and on but Haiti, Japan, Indonesia...you get the idea. If you haven't seen the link below (which you probably have) it is crazzzzyyyy. I mainly put it in here so in years I can go back and just remember what this was like.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-12709850

The one cool thing that I have seen everywhere though is how people, celebrities, government officials are tweeting and talking about "praying for Japan". News websites like Fox News and CNN are talking and writing about how people are praying for Japan. Maybe it's just me but I feel like this is not the norm. But it makes me grateful that so many people see that prayer is the only answer for something this horrible. Prayer is probably the ONLY things that can comfort so many of those people right now. Losing family members, every possession, EVERYTHING - I really can't imagine. It's like everything that defined you is just wiped away, literally.

So today and hopefully most days from here on out, I'm really choosing to live in the moment. God does not promise us tomorrow. He doesn't say that we will wake up the exact same way we do every other day. He doesn't promise that things like this won't happen.

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”  James 4: 13-15

I will definitely be keeping the people of Japan in my prayers as they struggle to survive this.

What I would give to walk out of my office and wander streets just like this...

It's definitely gonna be one of those day dreamin' days.

G CHAT CONVOS

my friend:  i know
um so & so's facebook status is "its a boy!"
hes you know who... for as "baptist" as that family is, they sure have alot of people that have had kids out of wedlock/with interesting people.
me: yeah haha seriously
my friend: i mean maybe hes talking in code. like as in he got a puppy or something.
but i doubt it haha
me:  yeah i doubt it haha

AND THEN.
my friend:  a few things:
1) where did she find a "22" birthday crown? they sell those? its not like a milestone bday...
2) how does shes get her dress to stay down when she raises her arms
3) they are drinking natty light and franzia. im so glad we're thru with that stage of life.
4) where is her boyfirend at her party?
THAT IS ALL.  

Yep, He loves me.

If you really start to think about it you get ONE chance in life. Now, not in the everyday things but at the end of the day it's all about that one moment, that one opportunity where He breathed life into your soul and you started your journey that was not about you but about something SO. MUCH. BIGGER. It now becomes about living a life that glorifies Him. a life filled with forgiveness, love, and faith. with struggle and uphill battles. But at the end of the day knowing that HE is on my side. That he fights for me and loves me when I continue to screw up. over and over again. HE LOVES ME.

"The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still." Exodus 14:14


I would say that verse has definitely carried me through the last year. It's probably one of the hardest things for me to do but He really has showed me what being still looks like. But even more what fighting for me looks like. Having someone who always has your back, who you can turn to, who loves you even though you are so broken and have made the same mistake for the 100th time. I can think about it all day and still be like "why me?" But it's simply what He has promised me.


God has been teaching me alot recently about patience. I have never really though of myself as being impatient but I see it in lots of small things in life. I think He is really teaching me what it is like to wrestle with things for the first time. That it's ok to be mad, frustrated, annoyed with Him. I feel like the more I allow myself to feel these emotions - the more answers I get. I love this...this feeling of being challenged. of not settling. of feeling the need to dig deeper for answers - in myself, in the bible, in relationships, in life. I think with this comes freedom and also excitement instead of fear of what is to come. It gives me much more peace to rest in His plan even though I may not always see the light at the end of tunnel in that specific moment. Being able to realize that NOT knowing is OK.


My friend Jenny sent me this you tube video of this worship song by Jonathan David Helser. Long story short it led me to downloading his CD on iTunes. In order to get the song I wanted, you had to buy the whole CD. It only has about 8 songs and some of them are like 15 minutes long so at first I was like wait, why did I just buy this? This is kinda weird. Needless to say I have been listening to it a little here and there. and I CAN'T STOP LISTENING to the end of his song In the Middle. Depending on the day it stirs up so many emotions in me but at the end of the day I feel like this song describes His promises. The love He has for me. Why he chose me and why he continues to forgive me and challenge me.


"Oh God, invading my space. You are closer than the skin on my broken frame. you know every word on my lips even before I speak. every day of my life Lord is written in Your book. You know me inside and out. You created me in my mother's womb. You never even thought about leaving me. even in my sin. even in my darkenss. even in my mess. YOU LOVE ME. You came down from heaven, perfect One. walked right into my sin and You washed the feet, the filthy feet of me. Who has ever heard of such a thing. that a King would wash his servants feet. Oh what a love, that the God of all, would come down from heaven above and wash the feet of the one He loves. You never leave."


And... I officially just rambled. ALOT. but I feel lighter. and grateful. and loved. Grateful just for friends, family and the direction God is leading my life in.

Wouldn't want it any other way...

A few loose ends...

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next."

ohhhhhh, so that's how it works.

 

 

Can't wait to get to College Station this weekend and see all my besties! Reunions there are always even more fun because we get to be alum and relive our glory days. Well, lets be honest, we are still living our glory days but still. There is NOTHING like spending quality time with them, wherever we may be : )

IT'S SPRING!!

Or close enough anyway!! It's March 1st and the most important thing about this day is that is  Stephanie Crook's bday! So happy to get to celebrate with her and so grateful to have her in my life : )

She also has the awesome opportunity to share her bday with the one and only Justin Bieber. If you want to know how she feels about that, just ask her...I wouldn't necessarily call her a "belieber" ;)



Upcoming events in March include...Emmie's 1st birthday party this weekend which also means a reunion in College Station; la bodega, daisy dukes, and all my best friends = perfection. Also in the next few weeks, Greenville St. Patrick's Day which I am SO SO excited about, a trip to Puerto Rico, my other roomie/bff KK's big 2-4, and ending the month with our first grown up trip to New Orleans!! Not that we will act like grown ups BUT it is the first trip we have actually planned and accomplished since we graduated and let's just say we have talked about quite a few. I can't wait for the many more to come!!

This past week was kinda on the rough side but I am just feeling so grateful for God's faithfulness through it all. He really never. ever. fails to show up in some way ALL the time. So, I think I need to remember that when I let myself get a little too stressed out...

Excited for kickball tonight, we are taking on some veterans so hopefully we can come out with a W-I-N. And then we get to have smcrook's first bday celebration with some flip cup and birthday karaoke, our skills hopefully helping us make an appearance on KISS FM tomorrow morning?!